Human sexuality is stupid and confusing

Dress codes are in the news again.

I’ve had my body non-consensually sexualised for so long that I’ve been through all the stages of grief about it – sadness, denial, rage – and I’ve settled on bemusement (that’s a stage of grief, right?).

I find myself watching this stuff, imagining what some alien anthropologist would think if they were observing us and how perplexed they would be. So I wrote this.

Content note: Sexual violence towards adults and children.

Zorb observation 97187532-S

Warm greetings to Command.

This week on Earth has been diverse and interesting. I now have 64 followers on microblogging site Twitter, posing as an elderly Dutch woman with an enthusiasm for popular band One Direction. I note the band seems to have entered a difficult patch after the resignation of Zayn Malik, who in my personal opinion, was the most talented member.

This observation, however, is around some recently noted human socio-sexual anomalies:   

  • Female teenager’s – children’s – bodies are policed by their education providers because they might entice violence by being viewed. Schools are swift to point out they are not in danger from staff at the school, which leaves me with several follow-up investigations around why this is enforced while children are at school or school-related events.

  • Children are themselves responsible for eschewing unwanted attention by not displaying certain areas of their bodies like their legs or their backs. I intend to find out the sexual relevance of a child’s back and legs and will report back.

  • Adult women’s bodies are also frequently criticised on both small and large platforms for being ‘provocative’. One assumes the provocation is around arousal. I have yet to ascertain why someone in a state of arousal is at risk of not keeping this to themselves if the context is unsuitable. I sense humans are confused and uncomfortable with both sexuality and self-control.

  • Many seem uncertain about when women’s bodies are sexual or not. Food (which, aside from Sitophilia mentioned in Zorb Obseration 97187159-S) does not appear to be sexual, leaving me with much more research to do on why publicly breastfeeding human infants is sexually contentious. Like breasts, humans use their mouths and hands for sexual acts. However unlike breasts, hands and mouths are not seen as irredeemably sexual. This seems irregular.

In conclusion, it appears humans conflate sexuality and sexual violence to the point where they are indistinguishable to many, especially those in news media. This is, what humans would call, a “clusterfuck”.

In galactic scienceness,



Please find attached a digital file of One Direction’s Best Song Ever.






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